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Thursday, May 19, 2011

Jealous Mommy

That little green monster has gotten the best of most all of us at some point in our lives.  It seems to be at its worst when we are younger though it can pop back up and bite us at anytime throughout the years.


It popped back up and bit me hard about 12 years ago.  I had not expected it, didn't see it coming, and had a hard time keeping it under lock and key.  


I never really saw myself being a stay at home mom...just didn't think I was cut out for it or that I had it in me.  That all changed the minute I became a mom and suddenly there wasn't anything I wanted more than to spend my days doting over my little bundle of joy.  


The end of my pregnancy was  a little rough on me so I had to take two of my twelve weeks leave of absence before he was born, which gave me ten weeks with him until I had to return to work.  


The jealousy began during those ten weeks. We would be at some gathering or function and I'd see one of them coming....the baby snatchers!  You know the ones I'm talking about, right?  Those ladies (usually older) who can sniff out an infant a mile away and they waste no time at all coming in for the steal.   


I could feel my heart start to race, sweat begin to bead up on the back of my neck and the anxiety rise up in the middle of my stomach....  


Oh God, here she comes.  She's gonna try to snatch him from me and he's gonna cry and then she's gonna start running down the list of reasons why he's crying, reasons that have nothing to do with the fact that she just snatched him from his mama! 


 ..."Oh, he must be hungry!" ...or..."Is he wet?"...."Ohh, bless his little heart, he's just sleepy!"  


"NO! HE'S CRYING BECAUSE YOU SNATCHED HIM FROM ME!  HE WANTS ME, ME, ME, YOU...YOU....BABY SNATCHER, YOU!  GIVE HIM BACK!  GIVE HIM BACK, NOW! HE'S MY BABY... MINE!" 


Okay, so I never actually said that but it took every ounce of niceness I could dig out of myself to refrain from it.  Horrible, right? I mean these were all nice people who just loved babies and only wanted to cop a little feel of that soft, chubby baby fat and breathe in that sweet, intoxicating baby smell that had long since left their lives.  
But I couldn't help it.  I didn't like it.  He was my baby and I wanted him all to myself, darn it!  Why couldn't they see that? Understand that?


There were certain people I didn't feel this rage towards, like his momaws and popaws and his daddy, Darin.  That is, until I had to return to work and Darin, since he got off work earlier, would usually pick him up from the babysitter's house. 


He learned very quickly that not having my Baby Boy Devin waiting on me when I got home from work was a very, very, BAD idea!  The first time I came home and they weren't there, I nearly blew a fuse and when he did get home with him and try to explain that he had only taken him to visit his grandmother or to show him off to some friends, I became even more furious!  


Clearly, I had a problem.  


When he was five months old, I quit my job and bought into my longtime friend's florist and began taking him to work with me every day.  (He was a very easygoing baby which made this doable)  And wouldn't you know it? 


That little green monster just up and left the building.


Fast forward four years to the Dracenator's baby days and there wasn't a green monster to be found within a 200 mile radius.  I was staying home, he was fussy, cranky and never slept.  O, Baby snatcher, Baby snatcher!  Wherefore art thou, baby snatcher?! 


The post was written for Mama Kat's writer's workshop prompt, "Write about a time when jealousy got the best of you." and Jenny Matlock's Alphabe-Thursday.




21 comments:

  1. Ha ha ha! That's great! The last part killed me. Too cute!

    stopping by from mama kat's

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  2. It's really ironic that sometimes we turn into the thing/person we would least want to be when we were younger. Good to know that you are loving being a full time mom to your kids..

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  3. Isn't it funny how the tables turn? Loved this story. Stopping by rom Mama Kats.

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  4. I don't like beets, but I love this post. I was so tired during my leave from work. I wanted others to hold him. He only wanted mom

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  5. That is the total opposite of how I felt with my first born. He wanted to be held and nurse all the time. But, going back to work was way harder than I ever thought it would be. I couldn't believe I was dreaming of being home with him and leaving the work life behind!

    What a great post!

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  6. What a cute post. I loved the ending!

    =)

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  7. I love this! So funny, those baby snatchers get the best of all of us! You are so luck you get to see him all the time now

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  8. First, you have a simply beautiful blog. This is my first visit and I just wanted to tell you that.

    Secondly, I could relate to this post so well. My jealousy also reared its ugly head during my mat leave, but it wasn't directed at the babysnatchers - no, it was toward SAHMs. I wanted to badly to quit my job and stay home with my daughter. I still do. I've never been the most career-oriented person, but being a mom? Well, unlikely as I ever thought it would be, I think I would make an excellent SAHM. So, the jealousy is still there.

    Finally, I love that you nicknamed your dog Lil' Bit. That's my daughter's nickname.

    Enjoyed reading you for the first time!

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  9. I know those feelings so well. I could never have pictured myself as a SAHM, but it's my big dream now.

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  10. So well written ~ you reveal bits of yourself and paint great pictures with your words! Love the little twist at the end too!
    Visiting from mama kats!

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  11. so funny and so true. people have a million excuses for why your baby might be cranky none of which include that my baby doesn't like you!

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  12. Funny how the tides turn! I didn't like anyone holding my kids either. I wanted them all for myself too!

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  13. I loved the writing, good job!

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  14. Oh my heck! That was hilarious! I totally miss those itty bitty days and I was glad to have gotten six months off. But I was insanely jealous of any SAHM. And Baby Snatchers?!?! Get thee away from me! :)

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  15. I tried that stay-at-home mommy gig for about 8 months and nearly lost my mind! Give me a classroom full of hormonal 16 year olds any day.

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  16. I didn't like those baby snatchers, either...LOL!
    Visiting from Mama Kat's!

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  17. very funny! I sometimes have that little green monster rise up when our doggie jumps up on the bed when I get up for work, or DH (?) feeds her too many treats! {:-D

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  18. Oh I know that feeling. My mother in law came when my oldest was born and she just took over. When he would cry, she would run to pick him up. It made me INSANE!!! By the end of the 10 days I was SO ready for her to leave.

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  19. Somehow I missed reading your post yesterday...
    Really enjoyed reading it, and now I must admit: "I am one of those baby-snatchers". Being of grandmotherly age, but with no grandchildren of my own, I am now drawn to babies more than ever.
    Cute post!

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  20. Damn those baby snatchers...they need a kick in the taco

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  21. Diane, I loved the easy, truthful quality of this post. I would be more than happy to snatch a baby. Our youngest Grand will be five in June and I think my heart is breaking from empty nest - round two!

    Thank you for sharing this excellent and visual writing.

    It was wonderful.

    A+

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