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Wednesday, February 15, 2012

My Reverse Bucket List...10 Things I Never Want to Do

1. Skydive. Why anyone in their right mind would jump from a perfectly normal functioning aircraft is completely beyond my comprehension.  If you ever hear me say, "I think I'll try skydiving" then please insist on getting my head checked immediately and without delay because there will be a one hundred percent chance that something has gone seriously wrong with it. 
 2. Be on a reality show. No way, no how could I proceed as normal with a camera crew all up in my grill.  


3. Get a tattoo. I would never, under any circumstance, agree to have a needle touch my flesh for any length of time unless it was a medical necessity.  Well, maybe to smooth out a wrinkle...At almost 41, I can't promise I won't ever go there but allowing someone to mark me for life with ink and a needle is not in my foreseeable future.


4. Climb Mount Everest. Or Mount Kilimanjaro. Or any other mountain known to God, man, animal or alien. 


5. Bungee jump. Having a stretchy cord tied around my waist, hurling myself off a cliff and being jerked and oscillated until my teeth and brains rattle will not ever be found in my How to Have a Good Time book.  


6. Dive with sharks. I watched in horror as Ben and three of his lady friends did this on The Bachelor this week.  I sat on the couch shaking my head and shouting "Y'ALL ARE CRAZY! HE'S NOT EVEN THAT CUTE!" at the t.v.  I'll be darned if I'd offer myself up as shark bait to catch a man.  Hellz to the NO!  


7. Go storm chasing. I saw Twister.  And The Wizard of Oz. No thank you.


8. Run a marathon.  I know it's what all the cool kids are doing these days but I've finally accepted the fact that running and I just flat out do not get along and there is no shame in my game about it. I will dance, I will Zumba, I will ride a bike, I will do jumping jacks, I will hula hoop, I will jump on a trampoline, I will swim, I will even speed walk. But if you ever see me running?  Call 911 because someone or something is trying to kill me.  


9. Have a Tarantula as a pet. One word, six syllables...A-rach-no-pho-bi-a.   I nearly jumped out of a car going 65 mph on an interstate when I spotted a spider the size of my thumbnail creeping its way across the windshield. Had I been in the driver's seat there would have likely been more lives than the spider's lost that day.  
10. Get up close and personal with my fear of public speaking. Matter of fact, pass me that parachute because I'd rather go skydiving.  


*This post inspired by the Writer's Workshop.



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30 comments:

  1. Were we separated at birth b/c most of those things on your list I would NEVER EVER do either. I have done public speaking..actually presented at a conference..this from the girl who puked 5 times on her way to give her first 2 minute speech for college class.

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  2. The only mountain I have ever climbed is Mt. Laundry. And that was only to demolish it. :)

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  3. i agree with your list..never want to do any of those things...

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  4. Girl! We should meet and NOT do all these things together... we can have coffee or Diet Dr. Pepper instead! Except #10, I hate it, but my job requires me to do it at least twice a year at Parent Night. Let me repeat myself; I.HATE.IT!

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  5. Cant argue with that list.

    I did trapse around Kings Mountain one time tho. And I aint afraid of spiders but inviting one in that can eat a small cat is just nuts.

    Aint it nice to feel alive without having to risk your life to get that feeling?

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  6. Your list could be mine! (Well, except for the last one. I did work as an interpreter at a historic property once, so giving tours was my job. And that is public speaking....)
    It's hard to understand what some folks do for fun, isn't it?! Great list!

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  7. We have 3 of the same things on our list: skydive, bungee jump, and climb Mount Everest. We are soul mates!

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  8. What a great list. I would add that I never want to be falsely accused or spend time behind bars.

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  9. Love me some ZUMBA! Running is for escape purposes only. LOL Great list!

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  10. I'm loving all these reverse bucket lists! I do have tattoos but I'm also diabetic and inject insulin 5 times a day so needles don't bother me :O)

    I would like to run a HALF marathon some time in the near future just to say I did it and I would LOVE to be a storm chaser. But I grew up in Tornado Alley and they've always fascinated me!

    I would not however under any circumstance swim with sharks...that in fact is on MY list!

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  11. I love this list! I'm with you on the mountain climbing and the storm chasing not ever!! And although I love walking 5Ks I don't think I'd ever run one let alone a marathon.

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  12. Great list and I had a giggle that you'd rather jump out of plane than public speak!

    Have a great day!

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  13. I work with storm chasers and they keep trying to get me to go with them. I say NO!!!! I'm much smarter than they are.

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  14. #8 had me laughing out loud! Not to mention that I'd like my knees to still be functional at 60.

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  15. Oh, how I can relate, Diane! NO WAY in a trillion years would I ever go sky diving or bungee jumping!!! Climb a mountain...yeah, I can handle that one! Swimming with sharks...I'll get back to you. I've run 5K's and loved it. I have a dream about running a marathon one day...a far off dream! No spiders for me! Have you ever watched the show "Infested"? BLECH!!!

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  16. Eek, no way could I jump out of a plane. Or bungee jump. I'd cry.

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  17. This could be MY list...each and every thing on there!!! And the tattoo one made me laugh. I would never get a tattoo...it's just not me. I just turned 42 and I often joke (kinda!) with my husband that I NEED botox!! :)

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  18. This could be MY list...each and every thing on there!!! And the tattoo one made me laugh. I would never get a tattoo...it's just not me. I just turned 42 and I often joke (kinda!) with my husband that I NEED botox!! :)

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  19. I can't do half of these things because of the good old back problem thing that involves 5 hours of fine tuned fingers hammering in lots of metal...so yea...I'll skip those things.
    But tattoos.
    I love em.
    I have 2 one on my wrist and the other above my hip bone.
    I'm getting a geisha girl tattooed down my side soon.
    Why the geisha? I used to want to be a chinese waitress when I grew up. I was in love with chinese people and figured I could be one. Sadly, I am not. But me and my grandma used to play chinese waitress all the time. She was my favourite person in the world.
    She passed 3 years ago. It would be in her memory.
    Sorry for the long arse comment.

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  20. I so hear you on this list! I can not stand public speaking either. Even if I could somehow pull content together for it, I would look like a tomato in a microwave up there. I flush like you would not believe and my head is fire red! Yes indeed, I would much, much, much prefer to go skydiving.

    I would go on The Amazing Race if I could eliminate weird foods, various states of undress, and swimming from the mix.

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  21. love the idea of a reverse bucket list! i agree with most all of yours :)

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  22. Haha, I love #10, **passing you the parachute!**

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  23. I'm with you on all of those except for public speaking...that doesn't scare me a bit!

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  24. Yes yes and YES...I have no desire to try any of those extreme 'sports'. I'll keep my feet firmly planted on the ground thankyouverymuch!

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  25. Even though I consider myself somewhat outdoorsy and adventurous I could never, ever bungie jump or hurl myself from a plane. Mountain climbing / rock climbing is a different story. I guess I'm OK with slow ascents and NOT ok with fast free falls!

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  26. Amen. Except on the bungee jumping. Already did that -- I was young and STUPID

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  27. I bet you would be a great public speaker. You have so much heart!

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  28. wow thats awesome man. thats so cool. really cool. i can’t wait untill we have flying cars and shit. everyone should know about the casimir effect its just so awesome. thats so cool. this web site is awesome too. http://www.enfish.com/reverse-diabetes/in-30-days-review

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