Driving Etiquette 101

1. If someone is nice enough to let you go in front of them in a long line of traffic like say, when you're trying to turn left into the car rider line at school with cars backed all the way up the other side of the street who are actually turning right into the school and therefore, have the right of way have the common decency to throw your hand up and give a little "thank you" wave...or at least nod your head, smile or do something to show your appreciation.  Because if you don't?  It is considered extremely rude.  At least where I come from. 


2. Dim your bright lights at night when you come upon another car. It's hard to drive when you are being high beamed. Plus, it's the law!


3. Do NOT pull out in front of someone especially if you are going to drive at a snail's pace while talking on your phone and weaving all over the road.  


4. Turning lanes are there for a purpose.  And that purpose is so that you can get out of the way of moving traffic in order to make your turn.  Don't stop, put your turn signal on and then get in the turning lane.  Because that kind of defeats the purpose.


5. Do not tailgate especially if the person you are tailgating is already exceeding the speed limit.  It is not their fault that you did not allow yourself enough time to get where you're trying to go on time.  Besides, you never know when you are going to ride the bumper of the wrong person on the wrong day of the month, thus placing your life in imminent danger. 


6. When you are on the interstate and someone is about to enter from an on-ramp, move your arse over and let them on if at all possible.


7. When the stoplight you are sitting at turns green, move it! The gas pedal is still the one on the right. I really don't want to get stuck sitting through this light again because whatever you were doing up there was way more important than driving the vehicle you are sitting behind the wheel of.


8. Do not turn left in front of someone who is turning right on the other side of the green light.  Unless you see a green arrow lit up on that big yellow traffic light in the sky in front of you, you do NOT have the right of way! 


9. Everyone knows better than to text while driving, right?  Right?  I mean it's now illegal in most states I think.  I know it is here in North Carolina. Just don't do it. But what about applying mascara while you are driving down the highway? Or reading or watching a movie behind the wheel? Yes, I have actually seen this...more than once! If you do these things, don't tell me. I don't want to know.  I just want you to STOP doing it!


10. Pay attention to all the other vehicles, pedestrians, bicycles, motorcycles, animals around you.  YOU are not the only one on the road in front of you and contrary to what you may believe, it does not belong solely to you.  We all pay taxes. This one especially goes out to the lawn guy who comes barreling through the winding road of my neighborhood at exceedingly high speeds while pulling his lawn equipment behind his big arse truck who has nearly killed me and mine twice in the past two weeks. I've got my eye on you.  And I don't mean that in a good way.